I don't know what it is with you people. Why does everyone get so upset when I say I'll gonna kill myself on my 30th birthday?! You know, at least I have a plan! At least I have the common decency to let people know ahead of time so they can think about what to say when the time comes. You're welcome for that, by the way. And hey -- I'm going back to school, I'm going to live life to its fullest (for eight-ish years). So you can't say I tried.
Okay, okay...fine! FINE! 35th birthday. But there are going to be some negotiations. First, I'm gonna have to do it with a gun. If I have to wait longer there's gonna have to be a mess. Second, I'm going to start having sex with escorts. Usually I'd stay away, what with all the STD's, but if I have to wait longer...there's gonna have to be a mess.
Besides, life ain't got nothing planned for me past 35 except baldness, obesity, grumpiness, the end of The Simpsons, taxes, bad knees, loneliness and, if I'm lucky, a swimming pool.
So there!
Okay, okay...fine! FINE! 35th birthday. But there are going to be some negotiations. First, I'm gonna have to do it with a gun. If I have to wait longer there's gonna have to be a mess. Second, I'm going to start having sex with escorts. Usually I'd stay away, what with all the STD's, but if I have to wait longer...there's gonna have to be a mess.
Besides, life ain't got nothing planned for me past 35 except baldness, obesity, grumpiness, the end of The Simpsons, taxes, bad knees, loneliness and, if I'm lucky, a swimming pool.
So there!
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