Showing posts with label Amie. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Amie. Show all posts

December 14, 2008

happiest man in the world.

Have I mentioned lately that I am the happiest man in the world?

Oh, I haven't?

Well, that's just a shame because I am. I am the happiest man in the world.

Should I repeat it?

Okay, I will. Just in case you didn't read it right.

I am the happiest man in the world.

And apparently I'm hung like an elephant...

I think she was joking about the part where she said I was hung like an elephant. Pretty sure.

I'm still happy beyond belief.

December 7, 2008

so there!

It's funny. Not "haha" funny but more like...um, "What the fuck?" funny.

Eons ago - okay, months - I was a Blog writing wizard. I could write a blog about how the deepest, darkest places of my mind would piss on, rape and murder my happy days with the greatest of ease. This could be almost daily. Did I get any complaints? Did I ever get any, "Geez, Nick! Your blogs are boring...they're ssssoooo depressing!" Hell no! I was praised. People would remark that, while I was writing from a dark place, the writing itself was exciting.

But now that I'm happy with Amie - and now that this blog is an accurate reflection of that happiness - this blog gets crapped on. I've been told it's boring or sappy or lame and all other kind of stuff.  Crap on it all you want, but the fact remains: I am happy and that won't change. Amie makes me happy - incredibly happy. Becuase of that, yes, my writing has shifted to the romantic. Sure, it's shifted waaaayyyy to the romantic but you know what...I'm not a miserable bastard anymore. I'm so friggin happy. Like I said in the blog before...deal.

That said...

Now ask me if I'd be rather be miserable or write exciting blogs -- oh, wait! - can anyone really read that Dolph Lundgren blog and say it's not the most exciting piece of literature since Lord of the Flies?

No. No, you can't.

So there.

November 29, 2008

the war on terror...and other things that are funny

Two items: 

1) I love Amie. If you have a problem with that, you might want to a) deal or b) deal.

2) One of my final projects for a technology class this semester is a power point presentation on the War On Terror. According to the rubric I need a catchy title. Now, set aside the fact that a professor has assigned a blanket "catchy title" requirement for presentations for social issues  -- approved topics include: domestic violence, the Iraq War, nuclear disarmament, home forclosures and illegal immigration. 

Or, as I'd title them (respectively): "I Fell Down the Stairs:Domestic Violence As It Relates to Transportation to the Second Floor," "Mission Accomplished: Did You See Dubya In That Air Force Suit? Totally Fuckable!," "Get Your Uranium Out of My Peanut Butter Or I'll Improvise Some Sort of Explosive Device and Detonate It in a Neighboring Country," "Thw Wealthy ARe Fucking Perfect, Right?" and, finally, "Honey, Did We Pay That Mexican To Pull Up Our Rose Garden, or Should I Call The Cops?"

Bottom line: A "catchy" title requirement is elementary school horseshit; sometimes "catchy" doesn't quite cut it for...oh, you know, a serious issue. So....Anyone have ideas for "catchy" titles? Here's what I have so far:


--He chose...poorly: George W. Bush and the Last Crusade

--"We're gonna kick their sorry asses all over the desert!!"

-- Mother Fucker! This is a War On -- Wait, What?! They're in Afghanistan?! Oh, fuck!

--Clusterfuck: United States and the Middle East

-- The War on Terror: 2001 to meh...whenever...

-- Hey...'Member When We Thought Russia Was a Problem?!

--Oopsies Poopsies: The Al-Qaeda Story

-- (D-List Celebrity) Says You Guy Done Fucked Up..Whaddya Gotta Say 'Bout That, HM!?

--Bin Laden?! More like Been Hidin'!

--I Only Killed the Dog Because I Thought You Said War On Terriers!
And finally...

--What Dumbass Thinks You Can Fit Such a Complicated Fucking Social Issue Into Nine Slides? No One Except Reneee Jenkins, That's Who!! 

No, seriously. I already have a title. So I just wasted your time.

Yay, me!

3) I love you, Amie.

October 21, 2008

well, hello!

I would just like to say....

I am in love with Amie.

And that is all.

October 18, 2008

here lies the underdog

You know I'm in love when...

Amie has ruined my love for the underdog!! I'm rooting for the Boston Red Sox right now. And that's because of Amie.

By nature I root for the underdog (see: 2001 Diamondbacks, 2002 Angels, 2003 Marlins, 2004 Red Sox, 2007 Rockies.) I don't hate a team once they've won a championship, but I certainly stop rooting for them as they can't be an underdog.

Alas, I have found myself rooting for the Red Sox, even after they've won two World Series championships (both in sweeps, I might add)!! Not that I don't like the Red Sox. In fact, even though they're exhibiting the makings of a "dynasty," I really like them. They are not a bought team (hello, Mr. Steinbrenner!); the success they've had is due to great management and teamwork -- I love Varitek, Pedroia, Youklis, Ortiz, Beckett, Crisp, Paplebon and company as individuals and think the Red Sox from about 2000-present have...psh! To hell with heaping praise and back to how Amie has killed...

...my love for the underdog.

Oh, well. I'll take Amie over the underdog. For sure. Any day. 

Next blog: The Nothing is Something which actually turns out to be a Wolf Man...or is it a werewolf? Who knows! But at least it's something...or is it nothing? Or worse! Is it The Nothing. Only something will tell....

October 6, 2008

best weekend ever

This past weekend was the best ever. And things are only going to get better.

That is all.



October 2, 2008

i love it

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I just love it.

September 29, 2008

don't be so effing corny

When I said "I'm pretty sure I think I'm falling in love with you," it was a bit of a fib. Fact is, I knew I was in love when Andre the Giant said, "Anybody want a peanut..."

...and you laughed hysterically.

That's when I knew. Sorry it took me a few more days to actually say it.

I love you, Amie.