Super Mario Bros. On a Sidewalk. Awesome.

A fella named Andreas Heikaus created this as a senior thesis. I get a little bit envious when I see such tremendous films, but then my little heart gets wamred when I realize I've just seen something so friggin awesome.


Super Mario Bros. from Andreas Heikaus on Vimeo.

Also please to be checking out this article listing the 20 Coolest Super Mario Bros Design Remakes. All of the entries are pretty cool.

I just googled Dolph Lundgren

So I'm bored. So bored, in fact, that I just googled Dolph Lundgren out of the blue.

Who is Dolph Lundgren, you ask? He is only the greatest actor to have ever lived. Dolph has more acting ability in the tip of his dick than Jimmy Stewart and Orson Welles combined!  That's a lot of acting ability in the tip of his dick, I tells ya!

Dolph Lundgren has appeared in four of the American Film Institute's Ten Greatest Movies of All-Time List. Check it:

#10 To Kill A Mocking bird 

# 9 Schindler's List 

# 8. Rocky IV - I never thought a Pinko with a flattop and man teets could be so sexy. I was wrong.

.

#7 Casablanca 

#6 Universal Soldier - I never thought a Pinko with a laser eye could be so sexy. I was wrong.

# 5 Psycho

#4 The Punisher - I never thought a Pinko in leather chaps could be so sexy. I was wrong.

#3 Masters of the Universe - I never thought they could fuck up the supreme awesomeness that is He-Man. I was wrong.

#2 The Godfather

#1 Citizen Kane

The other six on that list are pretty lame movies if you ask me. I'm a real man so I only like movies with explosions, swords, boxing, laser eyes and half-naked muscle hunks.

JCVD = supreme awesomeness to the mega max

This flick could be...totally...fucking...awesome.

(Well...maybe.)



Film Drunk has another trailer here.

Oh! And this is hilarious. I used to not like Andy Samberg. Now I do. You can all congratulate me for being so open-minded by sending me envelopes stuffed with money.

last exit to nowhere

Film School Rejects posted a story today about Last Exit To Nowhere, a clothing company that makes t-shirts with logos of places, corporations and companies from classic movies. Needless to say, I could drop an entire paycheck on this site.

Check 'em out! Last Exit To Nowhere!

My personal faves:

OCP - The authoritarian law enforcment corporation from Robocop.

Hill Valley High -- Marty McFly's school in Back To The Future (duh!)

The Winchester - the pub from Shaun of the Dead

Kevin Smith is still my hero...

First, the red-band Zack and Miri Make a Porno trailer...



And now, this clip from Comic-Con...

it's like two dicks...er, blogs...in one!!

Ya know what's funny? I've liked the Brewers since I was a kid. For the longest time I was "Straight Edge" (Shut up, Heather) and the Brewers sucked. Two years ago I "broke my edge" and the Brewers are good. Point being? If you are Straight Edge you are a loser.

Unfortunately it takes me being a drinker to make the Brewers a pretty good team. Which means it would take me being a coke addict to get them to the World Series. So the question is...who's gonna hook me and the Brew Crew up with some magic so I can fly to Milwaukee and see a World Series game?

I'll have to overdose to see them win the Series...FUCK!

------

I went to Milwaukee Friday and saw a Brewers game. If you think I'm gonna waste my time talking about how great it was you can all just hold your breath until you die. Why? Because. That's why.

Thursday night I was watching TV and saw a commercial for some new joint pain medicine. The ad went through the usual spiel about not taking it with other medications, but this one caught my attention because it noted that you should not take it if you have HIV. Now, I'm no doctor and I'm sure as shit not Freddie Mercury, and maybe I'm just ignorant, but...if you have HIV are you really worried about joint pain?

The Brewers game was awesome. The batteries in my camera died in the top half of the first inning. It was a long shot but I asked a vendor if anyone in the park sold AA batteries. Most people would simply say, "Aw, sorry. No." But this guy -- this fucking nerdlinger -- says, "Ohhh, no! If we sold batteries they'd end up all over the field."

News flash: I can be a total dick sometimes. It doesn't happen often, but sometimes a nerve is struck and I just turn into a bit of a dick. So he says this -- ALL OVER THE FIELD!! Really? REALLY?! And so I sez...

"That doesn't make any sense." A beat. I let this settle in. "If people were gonna throw batteries on the field. They'd be dead batteries. Like the ones in my camera."

Okay, so I could have been a much bigger dick. I swear I wouldn't have been so shitty if Miller Park wasn't selling plain ol' t-shirts for forty bucks a pop. All I wanted was a shirt with this logo on it:



Hey, you wanna know how fucking cool that logo is? To find an image you just have to search for ball and glove logo. I'm not gonna get all baseball nerdy but FUCK! That logo rules. More people wore shirts with that logo than the new logo. The Brew Crew should go old school...

I'm a nerd. I love it.