My mattress is now a U-shape. The past three mornings I've gotten up and felt the pain from my neck all the way down to the base of my spine. Today I woke up with the extra surprise of my knee throbbing for some unknown god damned reason.
Hey! Since your mom knows so much about so many different mattresses you think she could help me pick one out? I mean, I know she doesn't really sleep on them but I figure who else would better know which mattress has the best spring? How is your mom, by the way? Last time I talked to her she had a penis in her mouth (not mine) and another lady's mouth on her hoo-hoo (that's a vagina, ma'am). All three of them were making funny noises.
No seriously. I need a new mattress. Who do I have to fuck to get one?
I'm off to work. Get your minds out of the gutter.
Hey! Since your mom knows so much about so many different mattresses you think she could help me pick one out? I mean, I know she doesn't really sleep on them but I figure who else would better know which mattress has the best spring? How is your mom, by the way? Last time I talked to her she had a penis in her mouth (not mine) and another lady's mouth on her hoo-hoo (that's a vagina, ma'am). All three of them were making funny noises.
No seriously. I need a new mattress. Who do I have to fuck to get one?
I'm off to work. Get your minds out of the gutter.
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